My night in the ER

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I'm scared, y'all.

S

cared, freaked out, concerned, confused, sad & desperate to be more precise.

This past Sunday, my mother called me. I was asleep, but I got the call back text message when I woke up, so I called her back:


She - Would you like to go to Wal-Mart & Goody's tomorrow?
Me - *sing song professional secretary voice* No, I would not like to go to Wal-Mart & Goody's tomorrow.
She - Well you don't have to be hateful!
Me- *confused* I wasn't being hateful! I was just responding to your question!
She - FINE! *click*

She hung up on me.

So I'm like "Damn! WTF was that about? She's got issues."

It has bothered me for the past 3 days. Seriously. She flipped the fuck out.

So today I go to her house because I'm thinking I've got to find out WTF is wrong with her that she reacted to my simple, and frankly extremely polite refusal to go with her to the store.

Me - When you called me and asked me to go with you to the store and I said "No", why did you get so upset?
She - You didn't say "No".
Me - What did I say?
She - You were all hateful and said "NO! Why would I want to go to Goody's?"
Me - *shocked* Seriously?
She - *Beginning to cry* Yes! I was thinking why is she being so mean? Maybe she has PMS, but still that doesn't give her the right to talk to me like that! I didn't do anything to her.
Me - I swear to God I didn't say that. What I said was "No, I would not like to go to Wal-Mart & Goody's with you."
She - No, I said "Would you like to go with me to pick out Christmas presents for Evan."
Me - I didn't hear that. I know I was thinking "She knows I got my car fixed, so why would she think I need a ride?", but I didn't hear anything about picking out presents for Evan at all.
She - Well I said it.
Me - *crying & in shock* Well, I'm sorry that I said that. I'm sorry that you felt like I was being bitchy to you, but I swear I wasn't even feeling bitchy when I called you. I make a point of NOT talking to you when I'm feeling mad or PMSsy because I know in the past you thought everything I said to you was bitchy. But I don't remember saying that to you. I remember being extra nice when I called you back.

Y'all.

Whenever I call my mother, I make a point to not be bitchy or even sad because we do have such a long history of me treating her like I hate her and her acting like she's the most put upon mother in the world.

So now I'm freaked the fuck out.

In my head, I still replay it like "No, I would not like to go to Wal-mart & Goody's with you."

So the fact that she heard something totally different scares the shit out of me.

I mean, I've had instances where I can say something to someone and immediately forget what I said, I've said the wrong word like "Coat" instead of "Shoe", I've forgotten how to spell Milk or my name.

But never before have I had an experience where what I remember saying is so totally different from what the person to whom I was speaking heard.

Can you imagine how freaky that is?

Seriously.

How long has this been going on???????????????????????????????????????

Now I'm scared to talk to anyone over the phone.

In person, I can see the faces of the person to whom I am talking, so if I say something off the wall, I can see the reaction in their face.

But over the phone, who knows what the fuck I'm saying?

I'm scared.

WTF is going on?

Is this normal?

Could I be schizophrenic & not know it?

Have I had a psychotic break?

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME????????????

OMG.

Bye.

**UPDATE - 10:43**

I went back to my mother's house a couple of hours ago to hear the story again.

I don't feel any better about it.

Do you know someone with Multiple Sclerosis? Has anything like this ever happened to them?

Freaky.

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Now playing: Marvin Gaye - What's Going On?

I told you I can remember anything!

T

his is why Twitter is no good for people like me. Because I can't remember what the eff I said to them!

Click to enlarge!

For the record, always assume that Hugh Laurie is my number 1 guy unless you hear otherwise on this blog! ;-)

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Now playing: Michael McDonald - I Keep Forgetting

All kinds of junk that I'm posting ahead of time

S

o I won't forget. :-)

High Fives from last week & this week or whatever. My folder is getting full, LOL. I think I was just in a "special" mood for the past week or so, so a lot of things that wouldn't ordinarily make me laugh or bookmark the post made the list. Not to take anything away from the peeps who did make the post.

Whatever. Here they be:

Skirmisher
Frozen Caribou
Best Product Discount in the Universe
Honest Personal Ad
Hot Chick Plays With A Ball In An Insane Manner


Obama Comics: Vol 1 No 2 - Who’s the Boss?
Kewl Stuff I Found: Oh Really?
Unlikely Oilfield Wife: Am I the only one who sees the resemblance?
The Why File: Shave the Baby!

Makes You Laugh: Crazy Japanese Gameshow, Mice Mating and Lost Dog
Starcasm: Where's the LaBeouf?
SpicyBugz World: How Do You Spot A Gay Terrorist?
Loud Noises, Big Plans!: Touching Costs Extra


Amy Oops: High Five Fail, Soap for Men and Not Welcome
Stories in Life: Priceless
Jokes @ jDonuts: Which is Worse?
Journal of a Rock Angel: The One that will make you smile


This weekend, I watched Kevin Hart: I'm a grown little man. I never knew he was this funny! I remember that he had a TV show for a minute and that I'd seen him on ComicView, but not much else.

His special on Comedy Central had me laughing so hard I was crying. I liked it better than Katt Williams' "Pimpin Pimpin" special.

Here's a clip:



The "Special" mood that I mentioned earlier had me ROTFLMFAO @ Kevin Hart and then seriously crying the next. I kept it under control because Evan was in the room with me. He thought I was just crying from laughing.

I need to go ahead and switch my anti-depressant NOW. I've know it for a while, but I hate going to the fucking doctor, LOL. *sigh* I'll make an appt for the next time he's in.

I'm switching back to ExForge or whichever one I loved so much but had to stop because it wasn't covered by my insurance. It's covered now, so YAY! I hope the effects lasts longer than 6 months, for real! I'm tired of having to switch my Anti Depressant so often. Fucking Multiple Sclerosis making my body react in insane ways to meds.

Did I tell you that I think IBUPROFEN is what's making me so sleepy? I get headaches, take Advil, pass out for 3 hours. ???

Nothing else has changed. I just finally put it together. So I can stop wasting my money on OTC sleeping pills trying to get to sleep. I'll just take Advil. It's not even Advil PM. Just regalurr ibuprofen.

Anyway, I noticed today that my ear percussion is gone.

All this health stuff is what made me decide to take the Stupid Blog Quiz. I don't think I'm a hypochondriac, but who knows?

You Are 20% Hypochondriac

While your physical health isn't always perfect, you don't freak out about it. You know there's only so much you can do, and worrying doesn't change anything.

Are You a Hypochondriac?

Anyway, here's one of my favorite clips from Katt Williams: Pimpin Pimpin


I'm out!

Remember that episode of House

W

ith Harold (Harold & Kumar go to White Castle) and he had an infected jaw?

He was suffering from Aphasia. Where you can't remember nouns.

So am I. But it's more like CRS, cause I can't remember verbs or adjectives either.

Anyway, I commented at Ben's blog about "Bones" and I said "Constance is funny with her social awkwardness" (or something like that). He said "Yes, TEMPERANCE is funny." (But not mean, LOL.)

I just knew it ended with "ance".

And I couldn't remember David Boreanaz's character's name either.

I've been watching this show for a couple of years now.

The only new staffer on House that I know is 13, because that's easy to remember. I don't know which one Kutner is, unless he's Kumar?

When I try to remember things, I have to remember them abstractly. Like I know the Indian dude was in the movie "Harold & Kumar". So he's always Kumar.

David Boreanaz will always be Angel. I still watch that show almost every day when Evan is getting ready for school.

And that chick on "The Ex-List" will forever be Kurev's psycho girlfriend because that's where I first saw her.

ANYWAY, I finally remembered what I wanted to say when I first posted this morning:

I was about to watch Survivor when I saw a clip of the show "The Doctors". One of the doctors (a woman & ob/gyn) was having a "slumber party" type thing with 9 & 10 year old girls talking about sex. One of the girls asked what oral sex was.

The doctor said "It's basically kissing the penis or vagina."

You should have seen the faces on those girls! LMFAO! One of them said "Oh my God! That's so disgusting!"

That's cute. I hope her mom saves that show so that she can look at it when she grows up, LOL.