Somebody kill me . . . Pt 2

Mkay.

Had some soup.

Took a nap.

Now I'm feeling better.

Don't get me wrong, I'm STILL ready to die.

If it happens today, GREAT!

But.

I realize that I haven't yet found the right strength/prescription for my Anti-depressant and Thursday (when I FINALLY get to see my PCP) seems a looooooooooooong way away.

My anti-depressants NEVER make me feel like I want to LIVE, they just make me want to die LESS.

Get it?

So, God that hates me and enjoys my torment, just... help me keep my shit together until Thursday.

Help me STOP CRYING every 15 fucking minutes.

Make this adjustment to my meds be that last one I have to make for 6 months, at least.

Help me STOP making my wives/friends/readers feel like I'm seriously going to attempt suicide right the fuck now if they don't sent da poreeces to my house immediately.

Help them realize that depression is a roller coaster.  Sometimes I get really LOW Low low but I WILL, once again, rise to my usual level of "my life sucks, but whatever, it's been sucking since I was 13 so there's nothing about this particular low that makes it any different than the ones I've had in the past".

Help THEM even if you don't help me, because I really DO love the fucking shit out of them and I really do HATE to make them worry about me.

We straight?

Good.

I still think you are a petulant asshole, but sometimes you do good things.

Thanks! 

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