Tuesday, May 12, 2009

I know why God gives us babies.

Feeling Tired


ot physically tired. Emotionally tired.

The Boy is literally driving me insane. He knows how to push my buttons and he does it. You would think that I know by now not to give him the satisfaction of flipping the eff out when he does it, but I can't help it.
  • Constant noise making

  • Standing too close to me when I'm on the computer

  • Putting his face right next to mine when I'm asleep so that he wakes me up

  • Not doing his homework

  • Refusing to brush his teeth

  • Making me scream at him to do anything

Making me repeat myself 7,008 times (getting louder each time) until he does WTF I told him to do. It's like he's asserting his independence all over again, but since I never really went through the Terrible Twos, it's a new experience for me.

Evan 4 mosAnd that's why God gave us helpless babies instead of having us shoot out children who could already walk and do things independently.

It's because He knew we'd take endless pictures of them and home movies of them and fall in love with them and be grateful for how happy they made us even when we didn't realize that we needed them in our lives in the first place.

Evan MonstahWe learn unconditional love from them. We learn patience from them. We learn to be amazed by everything again, like when we were kids.

"This child has driven me to the edge of insanity before, and I didn't kill him then."We will remember how they used to want us to hug them and kiss them, and how they always wanted to be with us. We will remember how cuddly they were and how good they smelled. We will remember how funny they were when they first started talking and thinking about things. Even the devious things like "How can I get a cookie from Mommy before dinner?" We will remember not getting upset at them when they drew all over the walls or painted their whole bodies with finger paint. We thought it was funny and cute.

Evan HeadphonesWe need to remember all the good times for when they turn into hormonal teenagers.

We will remind ourselves "I love this child." We will remember the good times we had with the child before it became this defiant cretin. We will remind ourselves of how we had to pray for the strength NOT to beat the child when they took a pair of scissors and cut up our good wig.

We will remind ourselves that "This child has driven me to the edge of insanity before, and I didn't kill him then. This is a phase, he'll get over it."

We will remind ourselves "I was a little shit too when I was that age."

We will tell ourselves "One day, I'll get my child back from this demon named 'Puberty' who has possessed him and I'll enjoy him fully again".

I just hope there's enough Xanax in the world to last me until then...
Now playing: RunDMC - You Be Illin'


  1. I have always maintained that God made babies cute so we didn't toss them out the window. Even ugly babies, and there are many, are cute. By the time they can do things on their own and hit puberty we are simply used to having them around and have to remind ourselves how cute they once were. I'll share my xanax with you.

  2. Jen - They aren't ugly babies. They are "unfortunate looking" babies... :-)

  3. I'm with you all the way. Fingers and toes crossed and buckled in for the loooooong ride.

  4. You'll get there, never fear. My older boy was a devil until suddenly one day, I found I liked him - a lot. I've just been visiting him and I feel truly sad that he lives so far away. If you'd told me that 15 years ago, I'd never have believed you. Your day will come, you'll weather the storm.

  5. I've never heard of Xanax before, you mean there is such a thing??? I must get some!! I don't have a teen yet, my oldest is only 7, but the husband and the MIL are driving me crazy! I think I need all the drugs I can get! LOL

  6. hello... hapi blogging... have a nice day! just visiting here....

  7. I so related with and loved this post. Great words. Lately I have been thinking in comparison to my kids (I have three aged 2,4, and 10) I actually was so damn worse than them and yet they still get on my nerves to no end. I'm trying to lighten up. I guess it's all relative.

  8. DG - I hope I have the energy for the long ride...

    A - That's what people with grown children tell me. I'll believe it when I see it, LOL.

    Ane - Xanax is my best chemical friend. :-)

    Hapi - Thanks!

    Damien - You just wait. All the crap they're doing now is NOTHING to what your 10 year old will be doing in about 3 years, LOL.

  9. Xanax? You mean there's a pill that will make it all better?

    I think my Xanax looks like a scrapbook full of those cutie pie photos. But I'd probably latch on to the other if I could.

  10. Carol - The pill just takes the edge off the pissosity. It does not make the child go away...


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