Random Convos with The Boy

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van has a bad habit of flicking water on me if he sees me after he uses the bathroom or if I go into the kitchen while he's washing the dishes. I've told him 10,000,893 times not to do it. Sometimes I try to ignore it because I know he's just doing it to tick me off.

Today he flicked me while he was washing the dishes

Don't cry, mama. Are you gonna cry, mama?Me - *long suffering sigh* Just stop, Evan.
Evan - *squeaky puberty voice* It's just water.
Me - *saying nothing, but doing what I intended to do in the kitchen*
Evan - *high pitched voice with Southern accent* Don't cry mama. Are you gonna cry mama? Don't cry mama.
Me - *fake crying as I leave the kitchen until I see a plate that isn't in the sink* Remember to wash this plate! *continued fake crying*

I made brownies with peanut butter chips. I did not call him to lick the bowl. I didn't even tell him I'd done it until he came downstairs and smelled them. I use different color or design cupcake liners so that I can tell if he's been eating my brownies he will know which ones are his. He's been obsessed with "fairness" as long as I can remember. If I make shrimp stir-fry, he has to get the same number of shrimp or the extra one. *rolling eyes* I though this shit didn't happen with only children?

Evan - How come you gave yourself all the peanut butter chips?
Me - OMG. It's not like I flipping counted the chips to make sure I got the most!

I actually made a point to make sure he got plenty of PB chips. But I put his in first and mine in last, so it looks like I got all of the PB chips because his are at the bottom. I make them in cupcake pans because otherwise he'd consider 1/4 of the pan of brownies as one serving.

*sigh*
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Now playing: Robin Thicke - Lost Without You