Evan asked me if I have PMS

I knew a long time ago that a lot of male characteristics were (had to be) biological & not learned behavior.

Like leaving the toilet seat up.
Like not being able to see something right in front of your freaking face.

But this is the first time he's ever asked me if I had PMS.

Me - No.
E - Well you're acting like it.
Me - SHUT UP!
E - Or what?
Me - Or how I'm acting right now will seem like Christmas in comparison to how I'm about to start acting.

The boy has apparently NOT been doing his homework.

It's fucking crazy.

He comes home. Has books. Does shit. Never turns it in???

So I had a talk with all of his teachers Friday.

All of them said that he should be making straight A's (No shit.)

His MATH teacher told me that even without doing homework, he made the B on his report card....

His READING/SPELLING teacher (He always gets A's in Spelling, but this time he made a C in reading) told me that with his COLLEGE FRESHMAN reading level, he should have no problem with the maximum 8th grade reading level books in his school library.

His History told me that last year, he was always the first one with his hand up to answer questions. Now, he doesn't participate at all.

So this weekend I bought him a newspaper. Made him right write (see what happens when I'm so pissed off that I don't proofread before I publish??) reports on the economy, global warming & other shit in the paper. Truancy...

I also make him read 1 hr per day now. (Before, I thought "He clearly knows how to read, so why should I force him?")

Unhooked the cable, took away the DVD player & the game cube. New bedtime is 8 pm instead of 9 pm. Erased all of his cartoons from the DVR recording schedule.

I told him I was going "Dr. Phil" on his ass until the next report card.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH HIM?

I also made him write reports on what he wanted to be when he grows up and how it will feel when his younger cousins are in the same grade he's in next year & knowing that he's in that situation because he didn't "feel like" doing his work. (It's not that bad, but he doesn't realize that.)

So anyway earlier he's making his usual irritating noises:

Me: STOP! This is why I can't wait for bedtime. Why do you ALWAYS have to make some kind of noise? I'm so glad you have to go to bed at 8.
E: Because of YOU.
Me: No. Because YOU don't want to do your EFFING HOMEWORK!!!! Don't try to blame this on me. If you did the things you're supposed to be doing, Ms. Nana'sChurchMember/SchoolEmployee would not have told Nana about this bullshit which caused her to COME TO MY DAMNED HOUSE and I wouldn't have had to GO TO THE DAMNED SCHOOL to talk to your teachers. I told you last year that if I EVER had to go to that school again, you would be sorry. And if you don't pull your grades up, it's going to get worse. It can get worse now if you don't STOP MAKING THE FUCKING NOISE!!!!

Honestly, we go through this shit every year. He always stops doing his work around December. But I go talk to the teachers & it's ok.

This year, I talked to the teachers when it started. It just didn't get better.

And fucking Mommy Dearest comes knocking on my door.

Just what I need.

Is this what puberty is like?

I FUCKING HATE PUBERTY.

What has happened to my boy??? *sob*

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Listening to: Aaliyah - Are You That Somebody?
via FoxyTunes