NKOTB ft NeYo - Single

I

was asleep this morning and this video came on and woke me up. I recorded the whole show (something on VH1). I got to see "So What" by Pink (the video is funny) and I watched "If I were a boy" my Ms Sasha Fierce (Beyonce).

Anyway, here's NKOTB. I think it's funny that now they're doing Temptations moves in the video and Neyo is like 15 years younger than them and he's the new kid (relatively) on the block, LOL.

Obama's Campaign Commercial

D

iscuss.

Online Surveys & Market Research

I bought a pack of cigarettes.

B

ecause I felt like it.

I asked Evan if he thought switching schools would help him do his work. He said "No."

I didn't think so, but I had to ask. Made sure no one is bullying him or making fun of me. (Everyone at his school always asks about me because they know I have MS. They must think I'm dying. I have no idea what he tells them.) He said "No."

Then I was watching Coolio's Rules and I made him watch a particular scene when Coolio is talking to his son, who has no ambition other than being a rapper. He doesn't have a job, doesn't want to get a job. Doesn't want to help around the house, etc.

I was talking to Evan about the fact that his ONLY JOB is to do the best that he can do in school. Yes, I make him help out around the house, but I had to do that too.

I had to mow the lawn, wash the dishes, clean up around the house and STILL make Straight A's in school.

I told him for the 5 millionth time that he is not thinking about his future.

I don't even want to go into it again.

But I ended with "You don't have the right to say that you're tired of school. You've been going for seven years. You're 12. Get over it. There's always going to be something that you don't want to do or don't like to do. You'll have the opportunity to get a career that you love if you get into college. If you don't, you'll just have a job and whether you like it or not, you'll have to do it to pay your bills."

I sent him to bed.

Then I went to get cigarettes.

I got the cheapest brand (which always tastes disgusting).

Whatever.

I'm going to take a xanax and hope that it fixes my effing neck because the heating pad isn't doing crap. :-(

I'm not here

M

y neck hurts. Actually, it's my spine that hurts in the neck area.

And I want a cigarette.

*sigh*

Could I be a Vampire?

You Could Be a Vampire... If You Had To

Like most people, the thought of being a vampire has crossed your mind. But you're not sure if you'd do it, even if you could. Living forever doesn't sound half bad, if you could live forever with the people you love the most. But do vampires even love? And would the vampire version of you even be you? It's all too much to contemplate. Luckily, the chances of you ever becoming a vampire are astronomically low. What you would like best about being a vampire: Living forever What you would like least about being a vampire: Blood stained teeth

Could You Be a Vampire?

No. I wouldn't want to live forever. Even with 10 Trillion Bucks & a Hugh Laurie Look-Alike vampire mate.

Plus I'd miss garlic...

I keep having strange dreams

T

hat piss me off inside the dream.

How is that even possible?

Usually my dreams are so insane that I know they're dreams. If it's just weird and not bad, I'll just ride it out. If it's bad, I make myself wake up.

Anyway, first I dreamt that instead of just putting the aluminum siding on the roof of the bldg, they were putting it all over the bldg. But they weren't just covering the brick (who the hell would choose aluminum siding over brick anyway?), they were taking the brick off and then putting up the siding.

Some woman came over and started talking about how the construction of the building was bad.

Me - I wasn't even alive when they built this building.
Bitch - But still, you could have said something.
Me - How the eff could I say something about it if I never knew about it??

She ticked me off.

Then there was another apartment bldg (that does not exist) and people were moving into it even though there was no water.

Me - Why are they moving in there with no water?
Bitch - Everyone is afraid that if they don't move in now, that they'll lose the apartment when it is finally finished.

This ticked me off because it's just so stupid.

I assume this is because they still haven't finished my kitchen makeover, they still haven't put in the coving (or whatever) on my new door and now they're putting new roofs on the bldg??? Hello. I want my new stove.

Easy enough.

Today I dreamed that Evan kept bugging me for pizza.

He's currently on punishment for his report card. Punishment includes no eating out with me or with his Nana.

I kept telling him, in the dream, that he was NOT getting any pizza and he knows this so why the hell does he keep asking?

Evan - You're mean. This is child abuse.
Me - I'm not mean, you're just a sissy. Second, it's my job to make sure you're fed, not that you get to eat whatever you want. This is your fault. If you'd just do what you're supposed to do, this wouldn't happen.

This report card situation happens every year. It usually happens in the 2nd semester. This is the first time he's gotten a bad first report card.

I don't know why he does this every year, but it's driving me crazy.

I assume that's why I'm having the dream. I don't know what else to do. I thought that no allowance, no gamecube, no cable in his room, bedtime at 8 (like when he was 6) would be sucky enough to make him stop this shit, but apparently it isn't.

*sigh*

Any suggestions?

Please tell me you're watching these trainwrecks.

F

irst is the return of Celebrity Rehab. I get to see more of Dr. Drew's Gun Show. WHOOOOO HOOOOOO.

Anyway, Gary Busey is there this time.

He claims he's 13 years sober (that's if you don't include his 'medicinal' marijuana).

He thought he was there to be a counselor.

...

People, you have to watch this show just to see him. Furreal. I did not know that he'd had brain surgery. Maybe that's why he's so insane?

Also on this season are Rodney King. (Yes, THE Rodney King.) Some chick from American Idol season 1, Tawny Kitaen (who looks like The Cat Lady Jr *shudder*), Jeff Conaway (back again), Amber Smith, Rod Stewart's son, and Steven Adler. I think that's it.

Here's Dr. Drew's recap of the first episode:

• VH1 TV Shows
• Music Videos
• Celebrity Photos
• News & Gossip

Next is Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling with Frank Stallone, Dennis Rodman, Danny Bonaduce, Screech (Dustin Diamond), Tiffany ('I think we're alone now' fame), Ian Ziering's plastic wife, Tabitha from Bewitched (She looks the same!), some UFC fighter named Butterbean, Todd Bridges, Trishelle from The Real World Las Vegas... I think that's it?

Really, I just want to see somebody kick Screech's ass "accidentally". It's interesting watching them learn the moves, though.

Danny Bonaduce is crazy. You knew that already, but this really works for him inside the wrestling ring. It's okay to watch if nothing else is on...

Both of these shows come on multiple times, so just check your local listings. :-)

My Pumpkin Face is...

You Are

A Distressed Pumpkin Face You would make a good pumpkin pickle.

What's Your Pumpkin Face?

21 cigarettes in 56 hours.

I

normally smoke a pack to a pack and a half every day (20 to 30 cigarettes).

First, I started not smoking when I drive.
Then I started not smoking when I'm sitting at the computer.
Then I started not smoking for at least an hour after I eat.

I'm trying to break the habits of when I smoke, see?

Today, Evan said "Momma, please smoke for both of our sakes."
Me - You want me to die, is that it?
Evan - Everybody dies.
Me - But you want me to die of lung cancer.
Evan - You've got to die of something.
Me - FINE! I'll go get some cigarettes, but you're coming with me. (He's on punishment for his report card)
Evan - I don't want to go!
Me - How do I know you won't watch TV or get on the computer or leave the house while I'm gone?
Evan - Because I won't know when you'll be back. It's not like I can CTRL + ALT + Delete your session and have it back up when you come in the house or something.
Me - Uh huh, you're going with me.

So I went and bought a pack. Then I made him put some Windshield Wiper Fluid (or whatever) in the WWF place (I don't know what it's called) before I left because for the past few days my WWF tank has been empty and my windshield is dirty. I guess I was throwing a fit because complaining a little because:

Evan - OMG! Smoke a cigarette! You have them now!
Me - SHUT UP! I'll smoke when I feel like it. You're not the boss of me!

So I came home.

Waited 15 minutes.

Smoked a cigarette.

That is all.

High Five Friday

F

ollowing are the blog posts that caught my attention in the past week, in no particular order.

Hello Mother, Hello Father for Monday Poetry.

Reenashwina for Piercing Drawbacks.

Lalaine's World for Funny Warnings.

Beeline2Beauty for Obama Bucks.

Blah Blah Blog-o-licious for Ahw maze ing.

She Lives for The Sock Monster in Law.

Jokes at jDonuts for Karma Kills and Team Photo.

Blogsters Guild for QU!T 5T3AL!N6 O_R LETT3R$.

Odd Planet for Thieves try to get high on a dog's ashes.

Wanna Smile for Zen Moment of the Day.

Take it to the Limit for Too innocent to wear a poverty badge.

Archie's Pod for Healthy Juices.

Skirmisher for Can't a rapist and murderer have delicate sensibilities?

Jennster for OMFG!

Movie Meme²

I

was just checking my comments and saw that someone had arrived here from a Google search of "Movie Meme".

I read my original post and decided to do it again because I'm procrastinating on doing my High Five post (There are 2 weeks worth of links there) and so that I won't have to think of anything to write tomorrow or whenever (it's 10/12 night right now).

1.Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times. Underworld

2.Name a movie that you’ve seen multiple times in the theater. My answer has not changed.

3.Name an actor who would make you more inclined to see a movie. Cary Grant. After I saw him in that first movie (don't remember which one it was), I search for him on the schedule. There are a lot of movies of his that I would not have otherwise watched.

4.Name an actor who would make you less likely to see a movie. Ben Affleck. I recorded some POS on Sci-Fi last night because of Rose McGowan (not that I'm a huge fan, but I recognized her name among the actors) and as soon as I saw that I was supposed to believe that anyone would hire Affleck as the Sheriff of a town, I deleted it. Didn't even finish it.

5.Name a movie that you can and do quote from. The Matrix and any Tyler Perry movie with Madea.

6.Name a movie musical that you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs. Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

7.Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with. See above

8.Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see. The Bishop's Wife (Cary Grant). It's a cute Christmas movie.

9.Name a movie that you own. Shoot Em Up

10.Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but surprised you with his/her acting chops. Sela Ward. She started as a model. I've seen her in stuff before "House", but since her role of "Stacy" (House's ex-GF) I never would have thought she didn't start out to be an actress.

11.Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in? If so, what? No

12.Ever made out in a movie? Yes. The movie was Falling Down.

13.Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven’t yet gotten around to it. Casablanca. I actually recorded it, but I never got around to watching it. I wanted to see it. To see Ingrid Bergman in something besides Indiscreet.

14.Ever walked out of a movie? No.

15.Name a movie that made you cry in the theater. I rarely see movies in the theater. But movies generally only make me cry when I have PMS. Like "A Beautiful Mind". I gave myself a headache crying over that movie, LOL.

16.What’s the last movie you saw in the theater? One of the Star Wars movies. I guess it was the last one?

17.What’s your favorite/preferred genre of movie? Thriller

18.What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the theater? My answer hasn't changed.

19.What movie do you wish you had never seen? Devil's Rejects. I think that's the one directed by Rob Zombie. It was so gory. I like thriller, not gore. I don't watch anything that Zombie is involved in because of that POS.

20.What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed? Evolution. Yes, I have it on DVD and yes we still watch it sometimes.

21.What is the scariest movie you’ve seen? I wasn't exactly scared, but in one of the Scream (I think) movies, Jada Pinkett's character was killed in a movie theater full of people and everyone was cheering. That kind of horrified me because everyone in the theater thought it was part of a "show". I, unfortunately, am able to imagine crap like that actually happening to me.

22.What is the funniest movie you’ve seen?
I don't know what the funniest movie I've ever seen is, but Iron Man made me laugh out loud several times. It would have been more enjoyable if I wouldn't have had to pause the movie to explain the jokes to Evan.

That's it!

I can't think of a title for this post

T

he other day, someone knocked on my door and asked me to move my car (I park RIGHT behind my back door) because they're putting aluminum siding on the roofs here. Ours was the last bldg.

Because the workmen parked their ginormous truck where I'd otherwise have parked my car, I had to park it waaaaaaaaaay back. I also had to bring my walker in because walking 20 feet without holding onto something isn't a big deal, walking 100 feet without holding onto something means I'm more likely to fall because my knee decides to give out or I trip over something.

That's not even the point.

The other day when I went out to go to Wal-Mart and I was manuvering my walker out of the door, someone said:

Him - You need any help?
Me - No, I've got it. Thanks.
Him - You don't even remember me, do you?
Me - *Looking at him* Djimon! (Not his real name, but that's who he looks like so we'll go with that)

So, we talked briefly while I'm walking to my car. He said "You were real smart in HS, but you'd never let us copy."

HA!

So I was thinking, later that day "OMG he looks so good." Age has been good to him. He's about 5'3" but he looks like Djimon Hounsou. For whatever reason, blogger will not let me upload the picture.

I spend the few hours after that thinking "Damn! I should have been friendlier!" In HS I was a virgin. Those days are long gone and I NEED to have sex again before I die so I really should have been more "flirtatious". I'm just not good at that. I feel like a dork.

But I felt like he was giving me "signals".

It was the first time I'd seen him since "Flavor Flav" moved in so I figured he didn't come by here that often.

Today I go out to get some sugar and guess who's here?

Yes.

I wish Flavor Flav's guests wouldn't all sit in the back yard. Every time I see Djimon there are 6 other people out there listening.

I did make a point of speaking to him a little longer and saying "Well, it's good to see you!"

*sigh*

I wish I were a less "shy" than I am.

Good God, he looks good with his short self...

What Monster am I?

You Are an Alien

You're so strange, people occasionally wonder if you're from another world. You don't try to be different, but you see most things from a very unique, very offbeat perspective. Brilliant to the point of genius, you definitely have some advanced intelligence going on. No matter what circles you travel in, you always feel like a stranger. And it's a feeling you've learned to like. Your greatest power: Your superhuman brain Your greatest weakness: Your lack of empathy - you just don't get humans You play well with: Zombies

What Kind of Monster Are You?

My momma took me out for my birthday lunch.

F

irst, we went to the pharmacy to get our free flu shots.

I felt a fake boob. They had something for women (Breast Cancer Awareness Month) to see if they could feel the...what do they call them? Nodules? Whatever. She said I was the fastest person to ever find one and that I was the only one to find both of them.

I wonder now if that's what fake boobs feel like...

After that, MD took me out for my birthday lunch at the Chinese Buffet. I tried Dim Sum for the first time. I should have taken pictures while I was there, but I forgot. They had the biggest goldfish I've ever seen. It was like 1/2 a pound, at least.

Anyway, the Dim Sum was like biting through plastic wrap to taste a barely sweet mushed up pinto bean.

It looked waaaaay prettier than it tasted. That picture isn't the exact one I tried, but it looks just like it.

I made MD try it. We both spit it into our napkins.

I wonder if the one I got just sucked, or if it's always like that?

I got Rick Rolled by my own iTunes...

"That's just the way it is" by Bruce Hornsby had been running through my mind all morning (no idea why) so I put on my 80s playlist. Then after "True" and "Total Eclipse of the Heart", Rick Astley started playing. :-)

I still like Rick Astley. I don't care what you say! And I miss his freakish dancing, LOL.

Carol, your blog rocks!!!

S

ince everyone else in the world is giving out the same 4 or 5 blog awards that are being passed around like the common cold, I decided to create one of my own.

You know how sometimes a blog has one good post, so you bookmark it. Then they either disappear off the face of the earth, or every post since the one that initially caught your attention has sucked?

Well, this is for the blogs that caught my attention and kept it ever since.

No, this is not something you can give to other blogs. Make your own award. I don't want this to be a spam/meme/passitonordie type of award.

I AM THE ONLY ONE GIVING THIS OUT. I'm sure you have plenty of other awards in your Blog Trophy Chest to give out, so leave this one alone unless you receive it.

I'll try to do it every week, or whenever I remember.



The very first recipient of the "Your blog rocks" award is Carol. She has 2 blogs: Bass-ically Speaking and She Lives.

I originally started reading She Lives. It took me a while to realize that Carol is one funny woman! Most of her posts literally make me laugh out loud. Her blogs are a daily "Must Read"!

Now, just because you didn't get the award this time doesn't mean that you won't in the future. Chances are, if you appear in my "High Five Friday" posts more than once, you'll get one. So don't bug me! :-)

XOXO

I have nothing to say today

E

xcept this weekend, I caught a Jo Koy Comedy Special on Comedy Central. He cracked me up! I've only ever seen him on Chelsea Lately. I've got it saved until I delete it, or until I made MD watch it ;-).

Here's a clip of him on that Byron Allen show.

My Halloween Personality

What Your Halloween Habits Say About You

The scariest thing on Halloween is you! You definitely don't want any kids in costumes crossing your path - and you're willing to scare away any who do. You definitely think of yourself as someone who has a dark side. And part of having that dark side means not showing it. Your inner child is open minded, playful, and adventurous. Your fears are irrational and varied. It's hard to predict what you may be afraid of on any given day. You're prone to be quite emotional and over dramatic. Deep down, you enjoy being scared out of your mind... even if you don't admit it. You are a traditionalist with most aspects of your life. You like your Halloween costume to be basic, well made, and conventional enough to wear another year.

What's Your Halloween Personality?

These damned kids just won't let me sleep!

I

t's about 65 today. Finally I can leave my doors and windows open and air out my house.

It started with Evan.

When he wants me to stay asleep, so that I won't wake up and tell him to do something, he's extremely quiet. I mean, he can cook something and I don't even hear it.

Today? I didn't even have my ear plugs in and he's all

E - MOM, CAN I GO OUTSIDE?
Me - Whatever, just go!

So he throws his shoes down the stairs, opens the door to see how cold it is, slams the door, puts on his shoes and then slams the door again on his way out.

It's so nice and cool in here with the back door open.

Then Flavor Flav (my neighbor) has his kids over so they're out back screaming at each other and they keep waking me up.

I'm trying to sleep through Throwdown with Bobby Flay and then Iron Chef America.

Bastids.

They have NO CONSIDERATION for just how much I love to sleep when I know I shouldn't be sleeping because it will make it harder for me to get to sleep at night when I'm supposed to sleep.

So, yeah. When Evan came to the back door to get his football so that he can break another bone he and his cousin can play, I locked it and closed the blinds.

Him *from outside, to cousin* - I guess I'll have to go to the front, then.
Me *from inside* - Yeah, I guess you will!

HA!

*cries*

What I did on Friday 10/17/08

I

got a call from MD asking me to get her a phone like mine if Evan and I went to Wal-Mart this weekend. (As if we ever don't go to Wal-Mart on the weekend...)

So I called my doctor & asked for some more free samples of that pain medication. Then I called my pharmacy to refill my AD medication.

Waited for Evan to get home & drove to the doctor's office.

This is a red state, in case you didn't know. So every time I see an Obama sign I'm surprised. These rednecks (the ones I've spoken to, anyway) think he's a Muslim. So I took pictures of the Trailer Park Rednecks who support Obama, LOL.

Got to the Dr's Office.

Me - Go ask them if they have the refills ready for Angelika Lastname, even though it looks like they're closed (no cars in the parking lot & the blinds were closed).

So Evan went up and tried to open the door, he turned around to look at me & one of the nurses opened up the door.

Nurse - I was waiting for you. Here you go.

So I got 2 months of the pain medication (not narcotic, obviously).

Here's the view on the way to the pharmacy. It's a very spooky street to drive on when it's dark. Today was sunny, but the clouds, combined with the claustrophobia inducing trees make it look darker than it really was.

Went to the pharmacy and there were 3 or 4 cars in the drive thru lane, so I went in. Found out that they're giving free Flu Shots on Tuesday. So I'll be getting a Flu Shot without having to pay my ginormous $1 copay, LOL.

Went to Wal-Mart and got the phone.

Here are some of the things I see on the way to Wal-Mart.

First, the Blue Bridge. Since Evan was little, he's wanted to know what's on the other side of that bridge. MD drove across it once so that he could see what was there (nothing). But every time I drive on it I think about my former Redneck BF who used to JUMP OFF THE EFFING BRIDGE into the Tennessee River. I'm pretty sure he had/still has a death wish. In case you're keeping track, this is the same genius who stood up at his father's funeral and said, rather loudly, "He's going to Hell!"

Next is the bridge that connects the Blue Bridge to civilization. It's relatively new. I think it's been here for about 5 years. The other one has been here as long as I've been living here (20 years).

Finally, an Obama sign that was in MD's neighborhood. I don't think any white people live on that block. I actually think that MD is related to everyone who owns a house on that block. I'm not even kidding. I was surprised by the person that had that sign. They're like 20something drug dealers (allegedly). Do suspected drug dealers vote? Or do they just have it up because Obama is black? (I think that's why, honestly.)

When we first moved here, 20 years ago, the segregation lines were still drawn. Although MD had enough money to build her house wherever she wanted, she chose to build close to all her relatives. Her house still doesn't fit on that block. Every other house has either been there since I've been a child, or it's a modular home. I'd take a picture of it, but she'd be pissed.



I think the town is still segregated. The black people still build on one side and the white people still build on the other. I don't think it will change until Evan is my age and everyone is Racially Ambiguous. I think there's ONE black kid in Evan's class (I mean the entire 7th grade). All the other ones that aren't white are mixed. Which is why I can't tell him from any of the other boys if his back is turned.

They all look alike.

Isn't it ironic? ;-)

High Five Friday

H

ere are this week's High Fives in no particular order.

Woogledumplings for "Prevent Global Warming or else..."

Black Woman Thinks for "The Politics of Black Hair".

Stud Kickass for "Who Cares I'm Poor?"

Bass-ically Speaking for "Pat that guitar"

Makes You Laugh for "Lost in Translations"

Blogging Monique Renae for "Fathers be Good to Your Daughters". She really got honest and "bare" in this post. I think it will speak to a lot of people.

The Junk Drawer for "Think Hugh Hefner would be Interested?"

Freaky Frugalite for "Fun Photos"

A Fil-Am Journey for "Have You Seen This? Part II"

Cardiogirl for "It's Touch and Go for Dottie". I remember those days when Evan used to constantly ask me why or how or incessantly and it frustrated the patience out of me, LOL.

Blogsters Guild for "Obama Afro Art 2008" I don't know if I'd go that far for anyone (Even Hugh Laurie), but it's an interesting idea. :-)

Monkey Fables and Tales for "Rules to live by".

Skirmisher for this post. HA!

Memories Frozen in Time for "Air Jordan". Just look at the glee on that boy's face! :-)

Halloween Horoscope

Halloween Horoscope for Libra

You only like halloween if you have a special someone to share it with. You like a romantic scary evening together - no big parties or events for you. Costume suggestions: Romeo and Juliet or Batman and Catwoman Signature Halloween candy: Nerds Scary movie you should celebrate Halloween with: Silence of the Lambs

What's Your Halloween Horoscope?

*hurl*

How about Witch, Rocky Horror Picture Show & Gummy Worms.

The hospital called today

A

pparently, Evan has a small chip of bone in his finger, but there's nothing they can do about it.

So he just has to be careful for the next month and a half...

Like that will happen.

Guess where I was today.

A

t the Emergency Room.

Evan and his cousin were playing touch football. Evan jammed his right pinkie. Same hand that he fractured last month (or whenever). I figured it was jammed, so I didn't take him to the ER on Monday.

Today I told him to clean up his piss drops in front of the terlet with a Mr. Clean Wipe.

He likes the way the Mr. Clean smells. So he tipped the container back and some of the liquid ended up in his nose. It was burning.

So I figured we needed to go to the ER for that.

*sigh*

2.5 hours to find out that his finger is not fractured, just jammed (like I suspected) and he just needs to sniff some water/saline solution for his nose.

Yay.

Why can't boys play without getting hurt and why couldn't he just sniff the effing Mr. Clean Wipes without tilting the damed container back over his face????

Anyway, I made some muffins the other day. Took a picture of them because I could. :-)



Evan will not eat them even though it's the same freaking mix that MD used to make her Blueberry Cake.

FINE! More for me.

The ungrateful finger jamming Mr. Clean snorting testosterone having boy drives me batty.

That is all.

----------------
Listening to: Run-D.M.C. - You Be Illin' via FoxyTunes

It's a sunny day today

S

uddenly, I hear the Emergency Warning Sirens.

I continue to sit here because...nothing ever happens here and the internal closet is so filled with crap that we couldn't cram ourselves in there before the tornado hit anyway.

Then I hear a recorded voice saying something.

I open my door and hear

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
THIS IS A TEST OF THE EMERGENCY WARNING SYSTEM. THIS IS ONLY A TEST.
*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

I'm currently re-reading "The Wastelands: Dark Tower III" so it reminded me of Shardik the dying bear.

Oh! I got it on video. I am currently wearing a wife beater and underwear, so no appearance from me. But listen to what I've been hearing for the past 15 minutes.



Yes, it's still going on...

All I need now is the penis...

You Are the Father

You are a strong, powerful figure in the lives of your friends and families. In general, you value justice and fairness. You appreciate structure and rules. At your best, you protect and guide those close to you. You are a born leader. You are good at establishing order in chaotic situations. At your worst, you are a tyrant who rules through intimidation and criticism. You are quick to condemn other people as pathetic losers not worth your time.

What Family Role Do You Play?

Is he good looking?

I

was just in the bathroom plucking an eyelash that was sticking straight down into my field of vision when I heard Evan's TV on the George Lopez Show. (Plucking an eyelash doesn't hurt as bad as you might think it would. At least, it didn't for me.) I've never really watched that show.

Anyway, the show was about some neighbor that had just moved into the neighborhood and had a Mexican garden gnome and they (the Lopez family) found it racist.

I don't know how I ended up thinking about it, but it reminded me of a time when some white girl with whom I worked asked me if a particular black guy was good looking.

Me - Why are you asking me?
She - Because I don't know what is considered good looking for black people.

I don't remember how I answered her (it really depends on the time of the month) but I'm pretty sure that I said something about 'good looking' not being qualified according to race.


David Beckham would be good looking no matter what race he was. So would Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. And Ken Watanabe.

I'm getting distracted.

The point is 1) I've never said "He's good looking, for a white guy." and 2) What's good looking to me isn't necessarily good looking to you.

I happen to get all breathless and cheese like an idiot when I see Hugh Laurie (BTW, check out this week's TV Guide, if you haven't already. Hugh Laurie and the dude who plays Wilson - something Sean Leonard, I think - give an interview about their "bromance". Very funny).

But other people may think he's too old or too bald or whatever.

Attractiveness is subjective.

I just can't get over some of the stupid shit people say to me because I'm "less threatening" than other black people, apparently.

I remember at the pool one year some teenaged white kid asked my SIL why her palms weren't the same color as the rest of her.

Me - Do the soles of your feet and the palms of your hands tan? WTF kind of question is that? (I clearly had PMS that day.)


And just for the record, NO our hair does not feel like a brillo pad in its natural state/afro. I've had numerous white people ask to feel my hair when I wore it in an afro. They all said "It's so soft!". Then there was the white BF I had who stroked my hair while I had a relaxer (straightener) and said "Your hair feels just like ours"...

*sigh*

Just think a few seconds before you blurt out your questions to people. Even if 'some of your best friends are black', you really don't want them thinking that you're more of an idiot than they had originally thought.

:-)

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Listening to: James Brown - Say It Loud, I'm Black and I'm Proud via FoxyTunes